I’m trying so hard to be cute and perfect for you on our date night, but my tummy is betraying me with these deep, rumbly farts I can’t hold back anymore. My face burns red every time another one slips out, I’m so embarrassed that my new boyfriend is hearing how gassy I really am. I keep shifting on the chair, completely carefree that my jeans are sliding down just enough to flash my bare buttcrack with every loud blast. Listen to me apologize between giggles while my shy little farts fill the room and accidentally give you the sexiest plumber view you’ve ever seen.
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